I am sad

But I can’t cry

I am tired

But I can’t sleep

I am afraid

But I can’t care

I am angry

But I can’t scream

I am in pain

But I’m numb

I am alive

But I feel dead

I am old

But I feel young

I have a little sister

But i don’t

I don’t

Snake crept low into the garden

And brought temptation

As a storm of ruin;

It took barely a whisper,

Such was the human heart

Dying to be pushed from the cliff

That it might thrill in the fall

Ignoring the crushing end

While pulling everyone they could

Into the black abyss with them

Now we wait on our own Mary

To come on the cleansing sunrise

Wrapt in the robes of the blue sky

To crush the serpent beneath her heel

And spare us all from this cycle of pain

We

We fall into old shadows

When we’re in pain

Dark and hoary paths

That tear our flesh;

Unfilled holes dug blindly

To trap passersby

But ensnare us instead

And the cycle

It never seems to end

The stars are blinking out

One after another

And soon they’ll be gone

And me with them

Leaving empty blackness

Hollow spaces

Where there used to be

Something

Every light is vanishing

I cannot sleep

You are there

At the edge of my mind

Haunting my dreams

And the world

Still feels like you’re here

As though I could call you

And you would answer

Or I could text you a meme

And you’d lol back

But I know

I know your gone

And these are phantom pains

From a limb that was amputated

But the body refuses to let it go

I refuse to let you go

It is too hard

it rained
the whole long day
and all the night before
we found out…
you would have liked
the pathetic fallacy
of it all
i think

too soon
too soon
too soon

you
you were supposed
to leave last of all of us
you were the smallest of us
the one with
the loudest voice of us
you were meant
to close the door
and turn out the lights

how angry that it was now
that there was no more time
oh you would have railed
and so best you never knew
how pleased would you be
that Morpheus came
quietly in the night
to take you on your way
softly through the dream
and

onward
onward
onward

but how do we grieve
when the space you filled
still holds your shape
still carries your scent
like a shadow lingering
after the form has moved on
there you are in memory
there you are in art
there you are in
painfully, honest words
right in front of me
and gone

a boat sits
safely moored
in the shelter
of protected bay
comfortable
with familiarity
of a scenery
that remains the same
and it suspects
this is joy
this is happiness
this,
this,
this is what is
meant to be

until a storm
tears it free
and sends it sailing
to the wide open sea
away from land
away from the hand
that held it by the wheel
and lost in the waves
it looked ahead
to a new horizon
and thought
these are greater arms
that hold me now
than have ever
held me before

“A society that tolerates intolerant ideologies (like fascism or hate speech) risks enabling them to gain power and eliminate the tolerance of others.” – Popper

Translation: If you are going to be a hateful, fascist, homophobic, idiot… In the name of tolerance you will not be tolerated. If you can’t understand the logic of that, read a book.

This honest space

That surrounds

Leaving me

Alone with myself

Listening to Lord Wind

Singing from the west

With cool comfort tones

Daring me to speak truth

In a world

Filled with its absence;

What a rebellious act

Of outrageous courage

For a coward to consider

As the day wanes

And cool night sneaks in

To give us cover from ourselves

we are being pulled into the earth
that’s the feeling that presses
like a lead strait jacket wrapped
tight and tied in knots around our waists
this is how things are bound to happen
when you’re born at 10,000 feet
and plummet to ground like a whale
or an unaware but joyful potted petunia

we are blazing meteors
falling like lightning from heaven
to the darker kingdom
where we would rather rule
than serve anywhere else
happy little demons
whose wings have been broken
tumbling and freewheeling
into darkness